When hell is other people, find salvation in raising your game to a higher level!

A colleague said something recently that made me smile, when discussing some of the more frustrating aspects of life in the contemporary workplace or office - "The hardest part of my job is dealing with the other people in the office." - which might appear to be a rather typical or even urbane statement on the one hand, yet being completely revealing on the other. I laughed out loud at the comment, but it raises a few interesting points, perhaps the most pertinent being - is it you or is it them?

Anyone who has spent any real time in laboratories, offices or agencies knows that sticking a bunch of highly educated people together and asking them to get along and work contentedly beside each other is indeed asking for a lot. How many laboratories (for example) are truly full of the happiest bunch of people, skipping like little spring lambs through the experiments, all feeling that they get their fair share of attention/appreciation from the boss, and the same equal fair share of publications and scientific glory, and all freely socialising with one another even outside of the lab? And by the way, that's meant to be a rhetorical question, people!

Wasn't it Sartre who said that "Hell is other people"? Perchance, and he was not wrong, at least some of the time. It is unquestionable that one bad apple can ruin the barrel, but if you are feeling like the office is full of bad apples and they ruin your barrel, what is the right thing to conclude from that scenario? Surely in any remotely professional outfit, it would be almost inconceivable that management could be so off-the-ball that they would hire a bunch of people who are destined (meant?) to not like each other, right? That's another rhetorical question, by the way! 

As unlikely as it seems, it sure can happen, and whether it's by design or incompetence is almost irrelevant, because the challenge remains the same. But you know, for all the currently in vogue bleating about "the Team" (capital "T" intended!) and how "there is no I in Team" etc., I feel that in many jobs, most of the time, we should be and still are independently responsible for our productivity and output, irrespective of any team (small "t" intended!). As all cosy-warm and touchy-feely the concept is, I have seen examples where the concept allows under-performers to hide behind that big "T" in Team, and over-achievers to feel under-appreciated or insufficiently credited. 

Irrespective of the most definite infringement on your happy day that difficult co-workers are, one has to keep them in their place (maybe rather than putting them in their place!) as just that - simply co-workers, nothing more.  Focus less on them, and the chaos they may cause or attempt to cause, and remain as task-oriented as ever. In my opinion, while you may not necessarily get any social awards for putting tasks above people, neither will you ever get fired for being amazingly productive and task-oriented, and always delivering on time. Wasn't it Peter Buck (REM) who said that it's amazing how far you can go in business just by showing up for meetings (and presumably delivering) on time? 

Delivering most definitely has an "I" in it (more than one in fact!), and it definitely has no "T". Contributing your part of a team task will generally always get you a nod, whereas being difficult (co-workers) or getting yourself sucked into other people's chaos will not. The choice is clear. Furthermore, those who let others derail their day, and impact their productivity, are actually giving their office nemesis precisely what he-she wants, and playing right into their hands; they get to walk away saying you are the problem, after you get played into poor behaviour in front of someone more senior. Additionally, although workplace nemeses do exist, in many cases if one (or ideally both) takes a step back and tries even for a few minutes to see the other person's point of view or problem, then one can often see that you are both responsible for the misunderstanding or lack of good communication. It's not always easy I admit, but it is doable.

Having said that, if you do find yourself feeling that everyone around is either crazy or incompetent, or even evil, perhaps you do need to take a step back from yourself and look into that mirror long and hard. There's almost always two sides to every story, and one does need to do a reality check every so often, to ensure that it's not yourself that is being "difficult" and you are the one that no one can get along with. If that is the case, and it's the nastiness or professional injustice in that office that is making you so unhappy, then, once again, the choice is clear - in this case, get the hell out! Life's simply too short, and it isn't worth it. But do it the smart way and line up another job (doesn't need to be your dream job), first. 

If one can achieve total focus, ignore all the white noise (which is all it is) that may surround one, and become evermore task-oriented, well, that's hard to compete with or criticise. I don't know one manager who doesn't like productive performers and the rest is just icing a lot of the time. Anyway, having spoken with a lot of my network over the years, I realised that a lot of companies who spout the politically correct BS (because that's what it often is!) about building happy teams and look at our extremely happy group smiling at a forced outing at the local vineyard or chocolate factory, are simply taking advantage. 

The people in that happy photo weren't invited to go, they were often told to go, or going was in fact mandatory. And of course they are all smiling - who wouldn't when getting time off out of their day prison, being force-fed red wine or chocolate?! It's all a nice facade to present on the company website, even or especially after all have returned to the scene of their discontent or even unhappiness - the office. I lost count of the number of times I told someone that they seemed happy somewhere, and their reply was something like, what are you talking about - I am miserable here! A picture is worth a thousand words, not. Maybe it's more, every picture tells a story!

But like it or not, we are the primary authors of our very own story, and while we cannot control how others may try to grab our pen and write part of their story onto ours, how we respond to that is under our control. Ignore the white noise, smile to yourself, and get back to the real task of furthering your own story with a single minded focus on the task(s) at hand. Once the negative influence in your work environment realises they can't find a crack in your armour, and can't break you, they will tend to slither off after easier prey - which will be someone with a much bigger focus on office politics and gossip than on the bottom line - their job. Hell may indeed be other people, but refusing to let other people own even a page in your evolving story is nothing less than heavenly!